Posted by: heatherinparadise | February 12, 2012

Four-Eyed Forties

When I was a little kid, I remember longing to have glasses or the need to use a wheelchair or crutches.  Knowing what I know now about psychology, it’s obvious this was a longing for attention that I did not get at home, a classic trait in a child who felt abandoned by a parent at a very early age.

I used to try to lie on the eye tests that were given at school, but this never worked–my eyesight was always deemed fine and I never got the cool purple-framed glasses for which I longed.  As an adult, thankfully, my longing for glasses went away, although I suppose this blog is proof that the ‘longing for attention’ thing never really did. O.o

About a year ago, I started noticing that companies began printing can labels in a much smaller font, and that the only way I could read them was to hold them at arm’s length from my body.  Squinting also made them legible.  Soon, I noticed my bedside light must have been broken, since reading in bed became next to impossible, as the text was too blurry to see.

One day, a friend casually remarked, “Hey, did you notice that you squint a lot?  I think you should get your eyes checked.”  I became indignant:  “Nahhhh, not me!  My eyes are fine!”  After about six more months of squinting and holding things at arm’s length, I did a little research and discovered that vision changes at 40 are common and that many people (even those who’ve never had vision problems) at that age begin to require reading glasses.  I filed that away, but continued to struggle and refuse to admit I needed glasses.

Fast forward to this past Christmas, when a girlfriend who is my age came over to wrap presents.  She had her readers atop her head and tossed them to me to try.  As soon as I put them on, well, it was a miracle.  There was no denying any longer that I need reading glasses.  I’m 41, still feel like I’m 18, but facts are facts:  I’m old and it’s all downhill from here.

If I’m being honest, I think they’re kind of cute!  Yay, I finally got my glasses!

Don't I look smarter already?

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  1. They really suit you! Lucky you..

  2. I quite like my glasses. I only have to use them if I find myself at a screen too long, but the benefits includes being able to see everything in HDTV (it’s like a 100″ plasma screen attached to my head), an increase in my intellect by at least 50%, and are a great investment should I care to interview at some point in the future.

    • Plus, men look hot in glasses! On the other hand, Dorothy Parker said that men don’t make passes at girls wearing glasses, so it seems my already non-existent love life might get even more pathetic. :)

      • nonsense, that’s when you get to do that thing where you remove your glasses and swoosh your hair. That kind of thing. Of course you’ll probably end up tripping on something you can’t see.

  3. First I have to say that you look purty with or without glasses. I’ve worn glasses since 9th grade and have never regreted it. I did go through a vanity/sanity period in my 20’s when I wore hard contacts. Sometimes always dealing with glasses is a pain. Especially because I never get to wear those cool sunglasses with rhinestones and such. And, Heather, you ain’t old until you have to do like I just had to do…..enlarge the font on this blog to 150% in order to read it!

  4. I still remember the first time I put my glasses on. I was 8 years old, and wasn’t too thrilled about donning what I thought was a majorly nerdy pair of specs, but when I put them on, I couldn’t believe the detail the world had to offer that I’d been missing. Seeing individual leaves of trees from a distance, seeing distinct edges to the clouds…

    Amazing. Still one of my best memories, 17 years later.

    Not sure if you need any additional pairs of readers, Heather, but if you’ll forgive the self-promotion, we’ve got a nice selection at, and we donate a pair of new reading glasses to New Eyes for the Needy for every pair we sell. Check us out when you’ve got the time, and enjoy the bespectacled life!

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