This morning, after my weekly hour-long wait in the bank line, I hopped onto one of the tiny little colectivos to head back to the office. These particular colectivos are miniscule vans with seats around the inside rear cargo area and standing room in the center aisle. These vans are NOT ideal for anyone over, say, 5’5″ tall. Needless to say, when I get into and out of these “vans,” it’s like watching a clown at the circus getting out of a mini car.
The colectivo was pretty full when I got on and, as usual, there was blatant gawking at the rare appearance of a gringa on the route. I stood in the center aisle, but a woman tapped me and indicated a small space on the seat next to her.
Not wanting to be rude and decline her offer, and also hoping to straighten my back and remove my head from the roof, I squished myself next to her. In the process, I accidentally butted up against the legs of the teen boy to my left, who immediately jerked his knees away from my ass.
I heard the man across from me say, in Spanish, “She’s bigger than Mexicans,” with a sly nudge nudge/wink wink tone.
I looked right in his eyes and replied, in Spanish, “Yes, I have a big ass.”
His eyes got as big as saucers as he said, “You understand Spanish?!” Everyone around him laughed, as did I, and we chatted for the next 10 blocks.
Always an adventure.