Oops, I did it again…defended my friends like a she-wolf protecting her cubs. Last night, our old musician friend, Michael Grady, was playing at local favorite watering hole, Pinche Gringo. Well, he took a break in his set and allowed a “guest” musician we didn’t know to get up and sing some songs. None of this knew this young man and weren’t terribly impressed with his songs, but we did our best to be polite and attentive. He wasn’t a bad musician, in truth. What all of us really came for, however, was Michael Grady, not this random musician who might or might not have been just a tourist having a great vacation story to tell when he got home.
After the kid stopped playing, a friend of his with an English accent started moving around the room from table to table with a tip bucket, using extremely abrasive and unsavory methods of tip extortion: name-calling, belittlement, intimidation. When he got to our table, I threw in a handful of coins (was most likely around 30 pesos or so), and he looked in the bucket and said something, “C’mon, you’ve got to be kidding, that’s it?” I was pissed, but only said, “Man, we all work here, we aren’t rich, give us a break.”
So he continued to go around the room harassing people, then Michael told me, “Man, that guy was just a jerk to Steve.” I can’t even tell you the change in blood pressure that this news effected in me…I just BOILED. I mean, Steve is the nicest, most non-confrontational guy in the world, and I love him. I immediately jumped out of my chair and ran over to the effronterous bastard, who had then moved on to being mean to a gaggle of my girlfriends, to give him the what for.
It was a sight to see, Michael said. I hardly remember the whole thing, it felt like I was floating above myself watching myself lose my cool all over this guy. He tried to pat my shoulder, saying, “Well, ok, maybe I was a little over-zealous,” but I jerked my shoulder away quickly, saying, “No, you don’t touch me!” I pointed in his face, I moved my head from side-to-side, I let him know in NO uncertain terms that he would NOT be permitted to berate my friends any longer. Then I just walked away from him and sat down, afraid it would come to blows if I stuck around.
My friends and I had a good laugh about it and I felt totally energized and alive. For the remainder of the evening, the poor chap stuck to one far end of the bar, not daring to move back into the den of wolves who wanted his blood.
Too bad, buddy. If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a thousand times. Do not. Hurt. Or otherwise be mean to. My friends. If you know what’s good for you, that is.
The end.
I’m so glad you love me and are on my side! Wow! 30 pesos for bad singing and then extortion! I hardly ever give more than 10 pesos and nothing if they molest me without my permission. You know the ones. They just pull up a chair and start singing to everyone in general. Yuk. (of course, Fireboy is the exception. He gets 20 pesos!)
By: wayne on July 12, 2008
at 8:50 am
Wayne, well, maybe it was more like 20 pesos, I don’t know…I just grabbed a handful of change to get this guy away from our table. When it’s our friends like Chris Bolister or Grady playing, or the Nasty Bastards, of course I will be sure to give 20 pesos each round of the tip jar, or a big lump sum at the end, 50-100 pesos for an evening. I even collect tips, often, for my musician friends, but I CERTAINLY don’t use the methods this guy used.
It’s too bad, really, he ruined it for his friend, who seemed like a nice enough guy and not a bad musician. Not the way to endear yourself to our crowd, for sure.
By: heatherinparadise on July 12, 2008
at 8:54 am
i know why you like me-you display symptoms of C.A.S.!
Captain america syndrome. i have this same problem as well-save the fact that it’s nearly always punctuated with a left jab followed by right overhand punch. I commend you in walking away but i’m taking points off for turning your back on a limey.
By: pres on July 12, 2008
at 8:58 am
You couldn’t be more right, Preston. I should have backed away.
By: heatherinparadise on July 12, 2008
at 9:02 am
Heather is MY FRIEND! You hear that, mean people? Heather is MY FRIEND!! (right Heather?? please???)
Just kiddin–way to stick up for your friends, Heather; I admire your spit n gumption
By: charmarie221 on July 12, 2008
at 10:06 am
You’re awesome.
By: Joyce on July 12, 2008
at 10:23 am
Char: Of COURSE I would get in a fight for you, too!
Joyce: Thanks, but I’m actually a little embarrassed. This isn’t the first time I’ve been in a fight in a bar; you’d think I was Irish.
By: heatherinparadise on July 12, 2008
at 10:54 am
I LUV IT….u go gurlfriend…I totally AGREE with you…I am proud of you standing up to the JERK
By: luvinlife on July 12, 2008
at 4:40 pm
Props to you!
By: Sarah on July 13, 2008
at 9:49 am
Note to self- be nice to Heather’s friends.
(Crap does that mean I can’t let you catch me beating myself up!? That could be difficult!)
By: lisaloveloca on July 14, 2008
at 11:16 am
damn, the more i read your blog, the more i like you! i’m the same way – very overprotected of my friends. peeps need to know – its disrespect that sets me off. at the very least, people need to have respect for one another! way to go girl!
By: beachin77 on August 9, 2008
at 12:32 pm
Thanks, beachin! Sometimes I think I’m a little out of line, but I can’t help myself.
By: heatherinparadise on August 9, 2008
at 1:03 pm